How We Change – Drift, Disaster, Design

Unless you are unusually perfect there will be things about yourself and your life that you want to change. Chances are you have been wanting to change them for quite a while, but nothing much has shifted.

The reality is that there are only three ways that we change:

Drift – we don’t make any effort to change a path we are already drifting along on and end up somewhere we didn’t decide on

Disaster – out of the blue something awful happens to us that forces us to re-evaluate and change in major ways

Design – we figure out what we want, set goals and take actions to get there

The most personally satisfying path is Design. We look at what we want to change, we make a plan, and we follow it through. We get to experience the satisfaction of achievement and moving forward. Or, we get to see that maybe we didn’t want the thing after all, and that something different is what we really want. Either way we have taken some control over our own destiny.

To put some design in their lives a growing number of people work with a Coaching Psychologist. Someone who will help you clarify what you want, keep you on track and hold you accountable. Someone to manage the tendency most of us have to get unfocused and distracted from what if was we wanted to achieve.

Scott was a good example of this tendency. His business manufacturing extruded aluminium products was going along well . He was able to pay himself a good wage, provide employment for 10 people, and had a steady stream of customers, but he could never get any further than his current level. Despite his best intention to develop a strategic plan to move the business to the next level, problems with production, staff, cash flow or suppliers kept him distracted, time poor and pulled in too many directions.

Working with a Coaching Psychologist helped him see that the first thing he needed to do was to carve out weekly time for himself to take an overview of the business – to clarify his goals, the actions he needed to take to achieve these goals and to decide when he would schedule these actions. She then supported him and held him accountable to himself as he took each step.

This meant that, when he stepped into the maelstrom of activity that was his business, he could keep his head above water and focus on what he needed to do to make things move forward, rather than sinking into the unceasing demands of the moment.

A Coaching Psychologist can be thought of as a personal trainer for your life. They will support you to define and take the steps that lead you to creating what you want. Of course it can’t all be controlled, life happens, but there is scope for us all to put a little more conscious design in the picture.

Write a comment